Band Geeks: Mushroom Kingdom Style!
by Marth's Girl
Summary: This is a parody off of the episode of SpongeBob SquarePants, "Band Geeks" but even if you don't like SpongeBob or band, you'll still like it!
1. A Call from an Old Rival

This is my first fan fic, so I would appreciate some constructive criticism. I tried to make this as perfect as possible, but it still needs work. I love Mario and SpongeBob, so I thought, "Hey, why not combine the two?" So I did! My next story will be much better, so don't hate me! Well, here goes!

Disclaimer: I don't own Mario or this episode of SpongeBob or any related topics. I do own my own ideas though, so hands off! (evil laugh)

**Band Geeks: Mushroom Kingdom Style!**

"Squeak, honk, squeak!" were the sounds that emitted from Bowser's clarinet. He finally got a few solid notes out when a knock was heard at the castle doors. Bowser threw his clarinet at the stone walls of his chambers and went downstairs. He cracked the door open and growled, "What do you want?"

A short toadstool answered, "Uh, we're from the pet hospital down the street, and we understand you have a dying animal on the premises." The other toadstool standing next to him nodded, bearing a goofy grin. Bowser roared a tremendous growl and charred the two toadstools with his fire breath, sending them both running down the street, screaming and fanning their behinds. The smell of burnt mushrooms wafted through the air. Bowser smirked.

His smile faded when he heard the echoing ring of the downstairs telephone. Bowser stomped to the phone and crammed it to his ear, saying, "Hello. You've reached the house of unrecognized talent. Please start after the—" and he ended his sentence with a squeak from his clarinet.

"Sounds like you have a dying animal to attend to, eh, old chum?" said the voice on the other end.

Bowser gasped. "Bowsero Fancyson from band class?" he managed to say.

"That's right. Last I heard, you were an evil mastermind who was trying to find every way possible to take over the Mushroom Kingdom, but failed every time!"

"Uh...kinda. How's the unibrow?"

"It's big and valuable. I'm the leader of a big, fancy band now, and we're supposed to play the Mushroom Bowl next week."

"The muhmuhmuh, the muhmuhmuh, the muhmuhmuh," Bowser sputtered.

"That's right. I'm living _your_ dreams, Bowser. The problem is, I'll be busy next week and can't make it, so I was hoping you and _your_ band could cover for us."

"Uhhhh...."

"I knew it! You don't even have a band!" Bowsero cackled. "Well, I'll let you get back to your failures—"

"Hold it!" Bowser exploded. "It just so happens that I'm _not_ a failure, I _do_ have a band, and we're gonna play that Mushroom Bowl! How do ya like _that_, Fancy-boy?"

"Good luck next Tuesday," Bowsero said. "I hope the audience brings lots of..._ibuprofen!_" Before Bowser could respond, Bowero hung up, leaving Bowser with a mixture of rage and confusion.

"I gotta drum up a marching band fast!" he said as he shook his head. "Hehe, drum, hehe, band humor, hehe."


	2. The Flyer

"Mario, look at this!" Peach exclaimed as she plopped the mail on the dining room table. Mario was sitting there, eating out of a peanut butter jar with his fingers. He just stared at Peach. She was very annoyed.

"Since I can see that you're busy," she said sarcastically, "I'll read this flyer _to_ you." She cleared her throat and read the flyer, which said:

_Looking to add fulfillment to your dull, dull life?_

_Then become part of the greatest musical sensation ever to hit the Mushroom Kingdom._

_And be forever adored by thousands of people you don't know._

_Not to mention, free refreshments!_

_Practice begins tonight, eight thirty sharp._

"Eek!" Peach shrieked when she looked at the address. "This is from _Bowser?_ It has to be a trick!"

"Don't overreact, dear," Mario mumbled, his mouth full of peanut butter. He swallowed the sticky mass, took a gigantic gulp of milk, and said, "I've always wanted to play an instrument, so why don't we go and check it out? If Bowser pulls any funny stuff, we'll just defeat him like we always do. So what do ya say?"

"Well," she said pensively, "I have always wanted to play the sax. Let's do it!" she finally said gleefully, throwing the flyer in the air. She wiped the peanut butter off Mario's face, grabbed him by the wrist, and raced outside to tell the others.


	3. Rehearsals Gone Wrong

Bowser pulled up to his castle in a truck full of instruments, uniforms, and other assorted band equipment. "Stupid rental clerk made me late," he grumbled to himself. "That trilobite didn't know the difference between an oboe and an elbow! Hehe, elbow, hehe, more band humor, hehe."

As he was unloading all the equipment into the castle, he found all the Mushroom Kingdom residents sitting and chatting in the main guest hall. He couldn't believe it. His flyer actually worked. _They came despite all the awful things I've done to all of them!_ he thought. He grinned evilly.

"People, people, settle down!" Bowser announced above all the chitter-chatter. Everyone grew silent when they heard Bowser's husky voice. "Okay, now how many of you have played musical instruments before?" Bowser asked the crowd.

"Do instruments of torture count?" Wario asked.

"No," Bowser replied sternly.

"Is mayonnaise an instrument?" Waluigi asked while waving his hand in the air.

"No, Waluigi, mayonnaise is _not_ an instrument," Bowser replied. Waluigi put his hand down, and then raised it high in the air again. "Horseradish isn't an instrument either," Bowser sighed. Waluigi silently put his hand down again.

"That's fine, no one has any experience," Bowser began. "Fortunately, I have enough talent for all of you!" Bowser laughed and slapped his leg at his own joke, and everyone just stared. Bowser's laughter tapered off when he saw that no one was laughing with him. There was a moment of awkward silence.

"When do we get the free food?" Wario blurted out.

"Okay," Bowser started, "try to repeat after me." Bowser whipped his clarinet out and played the concert Bb scale. "Brass section, go."

The brass section, which consisted of Wario on tuba, Waluigi on trombone, Birdo on trumpet, and several toadstools on other brass instruments, played a sloppy scale, while some of the toadstools passed out from exhaustion. "Okay, good!" Bowser said, raising one eyebrow. "Now the winds!"

The woodwind section, which consisted of Peach on sax, Daisy and Yoshi on flute, and Luigi and a few toadstools on clarinets, also played the scale, but they weren't any better than the brass. Peach started to improvise by playing random notes, then she got really into the music and played while on one knee. Bowser had to drag her back to her chair by her hair to calm her down. "And the drums!" Bowser said.

The drummers, which consisted of only Mario and Toad, blew as hard as they could on their drumsticks, trying to play the scale. They obviously failed, and instead of playing notes, they shot the drumsticks out of their mouths at Bowser like darts, and he got pinned to the wall by the incoming drumsticks. "Too bad that didn't kill me," Bowser said disappointedly.

"Okay, lets try stepping in rhythm," Bowser said. "I need everyone to stand in straight rows of five."

"Is this the part where we start kicking?" Mario asked dumbly.

"No, Mario, that's a _chorus_ line," Bowser stated, his annoyance apparent.

"Kicking? I wanna do some kicking!" Waluigi yelled. He kicked Wario in the shin, and Wario started screaming in pain.

"Why you..." Wario began, then he and Waluigi engaged in a fistfight until they were outside. Everyone inside the castle heard a terrible scream from outside. There was a moment of stillness, then Waluigi poked his head through the doorway and said, "Whoever's the owner of the white Sedan, you left your lights on." Waluigi crept in, his body shoved inside a trombone. Only his head showed, and it stuck out of the bell of the trombone. When he sat down, a trombone sound came out of his mouth. Everyone just stared, dumbfounded.

Day Two

Everyone was outside this time, marching down the street and playing nothing in particular. It sounded similar to a train wreck. Two little toadstools were in front of the band, twirling color guard flags. Bowser walked backwards in front of the crowd, trying to encourage them.

"Come on, flag twirlers, really spin those things!" Bowser encouraged. So the two toadstools spun their flags a little faster. "Now, turn!" Bowser yelled to the group. "Flag twirlers, let's move, come on, move!" Bowser yelled. The toadstools twirled their flags so fast that they flew into the air, the flags serving as propellers. They flew uncontrollably into a nearby blimp, and a fiery explosion took place. A trumpet player played Taps, and Bowser curled up in the fetal position.

Day Three

"Well, everyone, this is the last day before we perform, and I know you, uh, haven't improved since we began," Bowser said as he saw Wario pull a bag of Cheetos out of the bell of his tuba. "But I have a theory. People talk loud when they want to act smart, right?"

"Correct!" Waluigi said loudly.

"So, if we play loud, people might think we're good!" Bowser announced. "Everybody ready?" They readied their instruments. "And a-one, and a-two, and a-one, two, three, four!" The windows shattered at the blaring sound of the citizens of the Mushroom Kingdom playing as loudly and awfully as they could. Bowser's shell got blown off of his body in the process.

"Okay, new theory," Bowser stated calmly as he slipped his shell back on. "Maybe we should play so quietly, no one can hear us.

"Well, maybe we wouldn't sound so bad if _some_ people didn't try to play with big, meaty mitts!" Waluigi yelled at Wario.

"What did you say, punk?" Wario said as he gritted his teeth.

"BIG, MEATY, MITTS!" Waluigi fired back.

"Well, these mitts ain't for just torturing that one over there!" Wario belted out as he pointed at Mario.

"Who said my name?" asked a confused Mario.

"Bring it on Wario, bring it on!" Waluigi hollered.

As they were about to hit each other, Peach got between them and said, "No, people, we should be smart and bring it _off_."

"Oh, so now the preppy little princess is gonna preach to us!" Wario yelled. Peach didn't like being called "preppy." "That's it, you're in for it now!" Peach said as she raced toward Wario with her saxophone.

"Wait, wait!" Bowser said. "I know tensions are high--"

Everyone engaged in a huge fight, using their instruments as lethal weapons. Flutes went flying across the room, and clarinets and drumsticks were being used as swords. Some people (as in Wario and Waluigi) loaded missiles into the trombones and trumpets and fired them off. "There's a deposit on that equipment, people!" Bowser cried over the commotion. The fighting got even worse and more dangerous (if that's even possible), and Bowser kept making feeble attempts to calm the crowd. "People, settle down!" he cautioned, but no one could hear him. Just then, the clock struck ten o'clock.

"Hey, class is over!" a toadstool exclaimed. Everyone happily said their good nights to each other as if nothing had happened, and then Bowser busted through the door as they were leaving.

"Well, you did it," Bowser said as tears rolled down his face. "You took my one chance at happiness, and crushed it. Crushed it into little, tiny, bite-size pieces! I really had expected better of you people. I guess I'm a loser for that, too. Don't bother showing up tomorrow. I'll just tell them you all died in a marching accident. So thanks, thanks for nothing." With those words, Bowser sulked away.

"You're welcome," Mario said innocently.

"What kind of monsters are we?" Daisy asked. "Bowser came to us in his hour of need, and we failed him. Bowser has always been there for _us_ when it's been convenient for him! Birdo, when your cat Mittens got caught in that tree, who helped him down?"

"Uh, a firefighter."

"And Luigi, when you blacked out when I kissed you, who revived you?"

"Some guy in an ambulance."

"Right! So if we all could pretend that Bowser was a firefighter or some guy in an ambulance, then I'm sure that we could all pull together and discover what it truly means—to be in a marching band!"

"Yay for the firefighter!" Mario exclaimed. Everyone cheered, and Daisy stepped up to the podium.

"Now let's make Bowser proud! A-one, a-two, a skidly-skidly-doo!"

Will the band pull together despite their lack of, well, intelligence? Read on and find out! (Don't worry, it's almost over.)


	4. Bowser's Shining Moment

Bowser walked slowly to the Mushroom Bowl's main entrance, obviously feeling down on himself. "I knew this was going to happen. They'll just have to find some other band to play. I just hope that, BOWSERO DOESN'T FIND OUT! BOWSERO, AHHHHHH!" Bowsero was standing right in front of him. "What are _you_ doing here?" Bowser stuttered.

"I just wanted to watch you blow it," Bowsero smirked as he pinched Bowser's cheek. "So, where's your band?"

A sweat drop rolled down Bowser's forehead. "Uh, they couldn't come. They died."

"Then who's that?"

"AHHHHHH, THAT WOULD BE MY BAND!" Bowser yelled in a panic.

The entire Mushroom Kingdom was standing there, uniforms and all. You could tell that they were really confident and excited.

"We're ready to perform, Bowser!" Mario said.

"Well, Bowsie, this is exactly how I pictured your band would look!" Bowsero said when Mario did a really strange dance.

"That's his...eager face," Bowser said as he placed his marching hat on his head. His band followed him through the entrance to the Mushroom Bowl and to the center of the football field. The announcer introduced the band, and everyone started to get nervous.

"I guess this will be the last time I can ever show my face in this town," Bowser whimpered.

"That's the spirit, Bowser!" Mario said happily.

Bowser took one more last at Bowsero, who had followed him onto the field. Bowsero grinned evilly at Bowser.

"Okay, let's get this over with," Bowser said. "One, two, three four..." He cringed at what he was about to hear.

A trumpet fanfare began. Bowser stopped cringing and looked around to see who was playing that wonderful music. But it was his band! He absolutely couldn't believe his ears! The fanfare all of a sudden turned into a rock concert, and the crowd cheered. Bowser just stared, mouth agape. He glanced at Bowsero, who was frozen with jealousy. Bowsero then collapsed on the ground, and the paramedics had to carry him out of the arena. Bowsero smiled, threw his baton to the side, and did a victory dance. He finally beat his archrival, and the taste of success felt great (this taste was very unfamiliar). He jumped into the air, the victorious expression on his face revealing that his dream had finally come true.

The End

So, did ya'll like it? Please read (that's part's done!) and review! I want advice! Thanks!!! ;-D


End file.
